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Yuui Otaka

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1 Yuui Otaka on Sun Jul 30, 2017 11:54 am

Yuui_Otaka


Name: Yuui Otaka
Age: 18
Birthday: 11 of Jun in 1666
Gender: Female
Race: Faunus (she has wings)
Height: 7' / 213cm
Weight: 100 kg
Face Claim: Yuui Otaka (Rinmarugames in the Anime character generator)

Stats
STR: 5 (Brawn)
DEF: 5 (Defence)
RES: 1 (Resistance)
SPT: 1 (Spirit)
Aura 150|150 HP

Personality
Major:Undecided
Likes: Cat faunus, Quiet places, Reading
Dislikes: mean Humans, Bullys, Losing a fight
Fears: Friends being killed, The end of the world, Being a slave
Talent: Stealth
Weakness: Social Interaction/Speech/Charisma
Overall Personality: Her Goal is Knowledge (She seeks to know all the secrets of the universe.) She doesnt like to let others know how she feels, or cares how they do.
She is serious almost all the time or doesnt participate in humor.
She faces every situation with a calm and collected manner.
She Apologizes Excessively ("Im really sorry we had to hit you with our swords, Mr. Kobold, sir.") She also has Amnesia ("I dont know where i came from...")
She Doesn`t trust humans easily and trys to stay in the background.
She often uses her wings to warp her body up when she wants to be alone.

Abilities
Aura type: Resistance
Aura Color: Black
Semblance: Buff: STR +2 (the buff is used on her wings, it makes her wings bigger so she can actually fly.)
Item 1: A Black dagger. The Dagger is Black with a few white stripes on the handle. The blade is really sharp and is realy resistand to damage so it cant break. A red small line is shown on both sides of the blade, from the tip down to the handle.
Item 2: She has a energy field that is on her skin. It is used on her whole body. Kinda like a second skin to be honest. It has a black glow and is usfull when hiding in the darkness. Its a extra on the Defence. (Defence: 1 x 10)

Here a little something that isnt from the template but something that will help to understand my character.
Yuui Otaka (A personal character info):
Role: Faunus and assasin
Weapon: Daggers with darts in them
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Appearance
Age: 18
Gender: Hermaphrodite
Height: Tall
Weight: Athletic
Skin: Average Skin Tone
Eye Color: Left=Red Eye right=Yellow Eye
Hair Color: Black Hair
Hair Stile: Long Hair
Style: Comfy (All that concerns her with clothing is comfort.)
Personality
Goal: Knowledge (She seeks to know all the secrets of the universe.)
Outlook: Cold (She doesnt like to let others know how she feels, or cares how they do.)
Humor: None (She is serious almost all the time or doesnt participate in humor.)
Emotions: Calm (She faces every situation with a calm and collected manner.)
Quirks: Apologizes Excessively ("Im really sorry we had to hit you with our swords, Mr. Kobold, sir.")
Quirks2: Amnesia ("I dont know where i came from...")
Birthplace or Home
Home Size: Village
Home Environment: Island
Home Industry: Military/Tactically Important (She comes from a place with a training center or military base nearby
Home Community: Dangerus (The people of her home are violent, and tent to parcipate in unsavory activitis such as gangs and narcotics trade)
Past
Past Events: Orphan (she lost her parents at a young age.)
Past Events2: Birthmark (She has an odd birthmark witch recognizably looks like a commonly known symbol)
Past Events3: Friend Murdered (When she was young her best friend got murdered infront of her.)
Education: Self Taught (She taught herself all she knows through books and experiments.)
Religion
Faith:Agnostic (she doesnt know if gods are real or couldnt choose what gods to beleive in.)
Denomination: Naturalistic (her religion puts emphasis on gods of nature and living in harmony with animals.)
Popularity: No Religion
Family
Siblings: No Siblings
Size: Overall Small
Family Outlook: Addicted (Drugs/Alcohol)(Her family members are all addicted to some kind of mind altering substance.)
Reputation: Well-Known
Welth: Middle Class
Sexuality
Sexual Orientation: Bisexual

Voice of Yuui Otaka:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tvoXmekOadg
time: 7:49
Character: Alphard
Anime: CANAAN

History:
Yuui was abandoned by her parents at a very young age so she cant even remember that she has Parents or even a sibling. She lived among Grimms who didnt do a thing to her. They were apperantly a bit diffetent than other grimms. Since she was a cold person she didnt had negative emotions (For those who say that they atack bc people have negative emotions)  She hid in the treetops so they would not see her and if they did they could not reach her. She lerned how to survive in the wild and how to hide without getting spotted. The Grimms were her only family. One day A Huntsman came and killed the grimm`s. He said something like that that was a close call and she could have been killed.
She just cried and yelled that he killed her family and went berserk. She atacked the Hundsman and they battled for about several hours.
Yuui won in the end and the Hundsman died due to bloodloss. The Huntsman was tired from the sleeples nights. Thats why she won. Ever since she cant trust humans very much becouse she also lerned later that He only killed her Grimm Family becouse a huge amound of grimm are bad and killing people.
she spend the Next 8 years
Reading books to gain knowledge. She joined the white fang in those 8 years and left when she was around 17 years old. She was great at disguising herself so no one even knew that she was from the white fang when she wasnt disguised. She only disguised when she was doing jobs in the white fang but not when she wasnt, so no one could link the crimes to her. She wandered around the world and did small jobs so she could buy some weapons and clothes. She was well-known for how helpfull she was but that didnt changed her opinion about the humans. They were still cruel and mean Creatues to her. She also had a time when she thought and talked like she stood above the humans. That was in her teen years thought and soon that behavor was gone as she ralized that this was only making thngs worse.

RP Sample:
she clears her throat
"Well first the History.  Following the Great War, the Faunus were given Menagerie as a reward for their participation, in conjunction with equal rights. While some Humans saw these rewards as fair and just, many Faunus saw it as a slap to the face."
she explains to some Faunus kids that were asking why Menagerie was only filled with Faunus and not Humans
"But there also was the Faunus Rights Revolution.
Over time, Humanity became adamant for the Faunus population to be centralized in Menagerie, and would later push for confinement of all the Faunus there, as well as countermand of the equal rights of the Faunus earned in the Great War. In response, the Faunus revolted, sparking the Faunus Rights Revolution." a few days later she went to Beacon academy. Oz was already standing there. He took a sip from his mug and asked "Welcome Miss.Otaka. How was your flight?". "It was alright i guess. Nothing but some odd stares but yea." she said and looked around. There were a lot of students out. I looked on my watch and it was around 8 AM. "Should i give you a tour around the school or would you rather go directly to your dorm?" Ozpin said taking another sip from his mug. "No im fine. I will look around alone." she said shaking her head "Cant meet new people when the Headmaster is around." she added and walked away. It was nothing new that she saw people who were giving her odd stares so she thought that this place would be the same. To her surprise almoast no one was giving her odd stares. Suddently someone crashed into her and she fell on the floor. When she opend her eyes there was a little red hodded girl on top of her. "OHMYGAWSHAREYOUOK?" she said as fast as she was getting up. "Well a girl with 300 MPH just crashed into me so i think i`m ok." she said and stood up, brushing the dirt of her.



Last edited by Yuui_Otaka on Mon Aug 07, 2017 1:29 pm; edited 9 times in total

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2 Re: Yuui Otaka on Mon Jul 31, 2017 1:35 pm

Richard Lionheart
Hey, welcome to the site! I think you maybe need to go over the rules and template once or twice more, a lot of stuff here you've got fine but there are a few missteps! First, when it comes to the FC, you would put that it was self made with a generator not just your name ^^ Second, when it comes to the actual rwby cast, characters with direct ties to main characters aren't allowed (as you've put likes Blake Beladona and cardin but no history I kinda had to assume you intended this?) You also have listed the "Skillful at, bad at" twice in your application. You also only get one weapon form to start and need to specify armour type on your shield.

As well as that you do need to include the history and rp sample shown in the template and all must meet the wordcount, current personality does not. YOu've got a bit of a climb but I think you can do it ^^ Bump when done


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3 Re: Yuui Otaka on Tue Aug 01, 2017 10:44 am

Richard Lionheart
Alright ^^ You've taken some steps forward but there are still quite a few more to take. You do need to make 300 words on the history, your rp sample should be 150 words. Written in the past tense, third person. While energy fields are fine for armour, that is not how it would work. Refresh yourself on the rules here ( http://www.rwbyrpg.com/t5-weapon-and-dust-rules ) it's just extra defence on physical or dust side; which you still must specify. Also you only have 12 stat points to spread, not the 17 you have listed, and it's 300 split between aura and hp in multiples of 10. Not 500.


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4 Re: Yuui Otaka on Tue Aug 01, 2017 12:24 pm

Richard Lionheart
Okay ^^ You're getting closer but there are a couple of things. First, despite what you said, you still haven't quite broken the 300 mark. Not to mention that the contents of it has a couple of problems? As far as we are aware grimm don't function on the same level as other animals, it's not just a bigger or stronger version of a bear, they are inherently drawn to negative emotion and only attack humans/faunus. (There are no instances of them attacking animals without provocation, only territorial disputes and when coupled with humans as Zwei was, but this is not the case with human and faunus) It's even debatable if they do consume in the same way humanoid species, or even other animals, on remnant do or feed off negative emotions or have a sole humanoid diet?

Being part of the White Fang is fine, being an orphan is of course fine and killing is to (Though like... you need to specify how it went at court or if the murder was even solved and tracked to you or the like, it'd be hard to get into a hunting school with a criminal record after all!) but do explain how a child did succeed in taking down fully grown hunters, whether it be their tiredness or sickness the like (Assuming you keep that in having removed the grimm stuff) Also, in your RP sample you make it out as though you would be RPing on Beacon, when Bellmuse (the island this whole site takes place on) is removed from the mainland. Not to mention it goes against the likes of face to face interactions with canon characters mentioned here http://www.rwbyrpg.com/t3-character-rules This isn't a problem as RP samples aren't part of the site, but just thought I'd make it clear ^^

There's also still a problem with your armour, it would be tier x 10 not 5 x 10. It starts at tier one, this 1 x 10 ^^ Bump when done


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5 Re: Yuui Otaka on Thu Aug 03, 2017 9:31 am

Yuui_Otaka
Bump bump bump owo Laughing

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6 Re: Yuui Otaka on Thu Aug 03, 2017 10:07 am

Richard Lionheart
You still have them inexplicably feeding her despite now having reason to. What I would recommend for the angle you've aimed would be, difficult and inexplicable as it would be, rather than being "raised by grimm" your character hid around, maybe through the use of treetops, a highly grimm infested area thus giving her that divide from people. Maybe finding them interesting to watch, but whether you feel a negative emotion or not if a grimm sees a human and can reach a human a grimm will attack a human/faunus. That is the key problem. Also, now realising I should probably make it clear, just because your faunus trait is wings does not grant you free flight, if you wanted that you'd need to power your wings through your semblance.


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7 Re: Yuui Otaka on Thu Aug 03, 2017 10:28 am

Yuui_Otaka
ok i did the treetop thing but i cant think of something that, if i used my semblance, she can fly. I think i need a little bit of help on that one. Oh and i kinda find it mean that she has wings but cant fly without the proper "Power ups" Confused

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8 Re: Yuui Otaka on Thu Aug 03, 2017 10:36 am

Richard Lionheart
I mean, that would be something as simple as "Enhancing the muscle mass in the wings" in order to make them capable of attaining flight. Or "Coating them in aura to make them more aerodynamic." With certain ways of describing it you could have it be an str buff as well, such as that explained enhancing muscle mass.

Do note, having wings doesn't mean you have to take flight. Just that you would be grounded with no way of using them for flight


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9 Re: Yuui Otaka on Thu Aug 03, 2017 10:52 am

Yuui_Otaka
is that ok or do i need to make it different. I kinda got confused by your post. I can get flight by increasing "muscle mass" in my wing but then you said that
Richard Lionheart wrote:having wings doesnt mean I have to take flight. Just that you would be grounded with no way of using them for flight.

and i dont understand that xD pls help me understand it a little.

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10 Re: Yuui Otaka on Thu Aug 03, 2017 10:57 am

Richard Lionheart
You need to explain what actually changes in the buff, like do the wings get bigger do the muscles on them grow or the like but outside that it's good ^^

What I meant by that was just because you are a faunus with wings does not mean you have to have a flying semblance, you can be a faunus with wings and no flying semblance, but naturally without that semblance you will not be able to fly. So if your app was as it were before you could be a faunus with wings, you simply couldn't fly with them and your semblance would have been free to do the smoke stuff you described ^^ I just thought what I last read my have came across as "You have wings, you must have a flying semblance" when that's not the case if you don't want to fly ^^


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11 Re: Yuui Otaka on Thu Aug 03, 2017 11:02 am

Yuui_Otaka
ok done. Laughing

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12 Re: Yuui Otaka on Thu Aug 03, 2017 5:57 pm

Richard Lionheart
Alright, last thing really (pending my final scans) is you need to state your faunus trait next to your race ^^ BUmp when done


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13 Re: Yuui Otaka on Mon Aug 07, 2017 1:30 pm

Yuui_Otaka
Bump Bump Bump >w< Laughing

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14 Re: Yuui Otaka on Tue Aug 08, 2017 1:06 pm

Richard Lionheart
Approved


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